A way to be happy is …?

Happiness & Holistic Integration

Do you know the way to be happy? Happiness is one of the human emotions that we human beings tend to seek every now and then. True happiness can be found in varied ways. We need to find a way to happiness that fits into our way of life and temperament.  John Powell, the great psychologist wrote a book on “Happiness is an inside Job.” In that book he highlights that some blame others for their lack of happiness. In reality the choice is ours to take it or to pursue the ways to happiness.


Possible hurdles to happiness & A way out of it:

Some months ago a very rich person said that every now and then he is feeling lonely and sad.  He was living a well-planned but isolated way of life where there was very limited space for social interest. In the course of our dialogue he agreed  to reach out to his needy neighbors few times a week. And that reaching out to the other selflessly, he later said, brought him some joy. There is an inexplicable joy in making someone happy and enjoy that. Try this if you are feeling low and dull. My sadness may be the result of my selfishness and closed outlook of life and relationships. May be true that happiness is invariably connected to sharing of something to someone above all doing something noble & altruistic.

The time to be happy is now… the place to be happy is here…the way to be happy is to make someone happy…” is one of the very inspiring songs I love to listen and get motivated.

Dance around & heal the world

God is said to be doing cosmic dance.  And different religions, particularly Hinduism talk about creation as the result of the Creator’s creative dancing. Wisdom literature in Bible talks about God’s wisdom personified as a lady doing a dance. And later on the same wisdom gets connected to Mother Mary the wisdom embodiment of God’s eternal love which dances with joy. Many religions have their own worship patterns and dance forms a part in some of them. Dancing brings relief and above all happiness to the dancer and to the viewers.

Dance then wherever you may be and whatever may be your burdens and worry dance them out!

Enjoy the dance of this noble elderly person

(Thanks to Br. Joaquim Hangalo Ofm Cap., Rome,( joajoshang@gmail.com) for introducing me to the beautiful world of Social Media & to Mr. Prabhu Christopher, Chennai, India for this lovely video)

Counselling is an Art…!

Counselling is an Art…!

Deep Desire in us:Calm-a1

Deep within us well all have the  desire towards ‘well-being’ and good health.  The unhealed wounds of the past leave a scar on each one of us and we have to understand the importance of healing. Well-being would include many aspects of our personality. That is physical, psychological and spiritual. A correct insight will be to take care of the person in his/her totality. Taking one aspect of a physical nature for consideration will not lead to a lasting healing or well-being. Like for example, a person who complains of having headache very often may be having certainly physical aspect to look into but deep down there could be also emotional concerns that he has neglected to take care of. A realistic counseling psychologist will tend to address those areas where he has suffered pain and set back in his emotional level.

Counselling is an art

Conselling is a passion, gift and an art to be further learned with the sense of wonder. While helping a person through this art or skill one can realize the gift one has to reach out to the other. It is an attempt to facilitate lasting changes in a person by knowing the inner and outer world of the client and thus helping the individual handle the emotional and other aspect of his/her personality.

Noble entry into the world of Counselling

Counselling involves two persons minimum that is the counselor and the counselee who is being helped to take care of himself. Group counseling sessions may have more than one person and can be had with many persons. During the Tsunami counseling sessions I had accompanied hundreds of traumatized persons in a hall due to the vastness of the number and other practical reasons. All that is important is to facilitate changes in persons and help them open up their inner potential to heal themselves.

Non-Judgemental compassionate presence

I still remember an event that took place in my counseling career. One day a person came to my office and said that she wanted to talk to me. I welcomed her and made her feel comfortable. After few seconds of casual introduction she handed over a bunch of paper and said, “Please go through this and I will come to meet you tomorrow.” I got that and when I started reading the content of the materials written I realized that it was her life story with all its details. She had verbalized all her life journey with its pitfalls and struggles. The next evening she came to my office and asked that am I not upset with her life story. “I felt very small before your truthfulness and the trust you had to share with me your life story.” I further encouraged her to handle her emotions and get healed. It was a insight filled moment of respect and leaning about how counseling sessions could become moments of sacred encounter with other human beings who are fragile and tender.


It is a non-judgmental compassionate presence of a counselor which works wonders in the heart and life of the client. A good counselor can awaken the healing potentials within the client and make him see his life differently from the way she used to.

In this there is a need to have a good understanding and positive outlook towards one’s own psycho-sexual nature and its beauty. It could be also important to understand the need to develop life-giving relationships.

Try to listen to people in a non-judgemental way.