During the moments of Anxiety & fear … What can we do?

In all our lives there could be moments when our roots are shaken due to some untoward happening or failure. During those painful or frightening moments the predominant emotions like fear and anxiety surface in great proportions.

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“I am afraid that my reputation will be gone. I fear terribly that someone my tarnish my name in the web by publishing materials against me. What will my family think about me if it happens? Will I be able to stand the calumny of my opponents? How could I safeguard my good reputation? I think it is better that I run away somewhere to the unknown place…” Thoughts of this nature are sure to surge in times of great agony, accusation and fall. Have you had these moments in your life? How to help people who suffer similar moments of uncertainty and anxiety?

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The possible responses:

-Talk to someone who care about you. A Good counselor, a friend, a caring family member who can understand or a spiritual companion

-Inhibit: Mind will crowd you with too many anxious thoughts so try to set priorities and say that you will deal with one issue at a time.

-Positive whispers to boost the inner child: Tell to yourself that you are in control of yourself. You are a good person, sincere, noble and genuine. You will do your best to improve the situation. There are people to support you… etc.

-Deep breathing: deep breathing is said to be of great help to handle a crisis moment. I used to ask stressed people to inhale and exhale slowly and deeply as often as possible specially during the moment of deep stress and anxiety. It has calming effect on our whole person.

-Handling anxiety: Too many things will bring more anxious thoughts and to handle this one could just doing some relaxation exercise, sing a song that gives hope and optimism, go for a free walk.

-Meditation: I would recommend a ‘Harmonic Integration Meditation’ Try to find a quiet place in your vicinity and sit quietly there for a while  if you can. Then being there slowly become aware of the Creator God’s presence in and around you. In fantasy go to a comfort zone and be there with the beloved Creator God in a way that pleases you. Allow the healing grace and warmth of HIM/HER flow through you and into the persons/situations that make you suffer. Surrender everything and be there as long as you wanted. Reminding yourself that you rely on God’s help and will overcome this agony with His/Her help. You may also visit: http://charlesalphonse.blogspot.co.il/2016/11/purnarita-dhyana-harmonious-integration.html

-Plan out a course of action/response with the help of friends and others who can be of support and help to you. Believe & remember that you have the potential within to respond appropriately!

‘Miracle’ by Stephanie Norgate

You are right Stephanie! Miracles are present every where specially in places where we least expect. Because most of the time our horizons are narrowed down due to our prejudices and may be from wounds.
Let us become miracle workers through our love filled attitudes and generosity. It’s time that we start doing something to touch the hearts that are closed in rigidity and selfishness.
We need miracles & eyes to recognise them.

Thanks for your invitation to enter further into the world of miracles!

A Brother who sang peace songs with the birds! — Holistic and Creative Optimism

Yesterday I read an interesting article in BBC website with the title: The Magpie that saved a family by Vibeke Venema. According to her: “Sam Bloom fell into a deep depression after a fall from a roof terrace during a family holiday left her paralyzed from the chest down. But help was to come from…

via A Brother who sang peace songs with the birds! — Holistic and Creative Optimism

Harmonious Integration

What does this mean?

In one of my recent seminars one of our participants raised this question. Today we hear a lot about integration and so what does this mean? Another person asked what does this mean to be an integrated person in this violence filled & exploiting world?

Like once a middle aged person approached an elderly person and began talking about the world conflicts and particularly the political and religious conflicts that affect the world. Immediately the elderly person closed his eyes and said: Leave me alone and don’t disturb my serenity.”

Respecting people for their age we need to also ask a serious question about what does it mean to be an integrated person in this world of ours. Is it to close ourselves within a protected shell and avoid facing the reality ?

Harmony could come by individual and common initiatives of integration. Truly inspired people cannot keep quiet, they have to do something and be somebody to make this world little more harmonious place. In this process one may have to make big sacrifices, sometimes loose the comfort, power and even very life. There are some realities where there is no other choice than to be pro-active if not one may be led to violent reactions.

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Important target groups are our Children & Youth: Our present and future youth need attention and affection along with other motivational educative measures to have a global mindset while growing up in a local context. Some of them are deprived of safer, conducive and affectionate environment to grow healthily. In all the war & conflict ridden countries, children are the worst affected persons who are in danger of becoming rigid, violent and cold. They are disintegrated in many ways. All truly sensible and faith-filled people have the responsibility to come together to transform this world a better place of respect, love and dignity. Running away is neither the solution nor the sign of integration. What we need is global collaboration for a just and safer world.

 

Musings about Mother Teresa (2)

Pope Francis said, “Let us give face to God through our service to the needy and the poor…let us carry the smile of Mother Teresa in our hearts. Today she is made a Saint but many who knew her are so used to call her affectionately as ‘ Mother’ and that will remain.” (During the Canonization Ceremony at St. Peter’s Square, Rome, Italy on 4th September 2016)

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I happened to meet two Missionaries of Charity sisters this morning and they asked me the way to go to St Peter’s Square. Since I was also heading closer to that direction it was a blessing to meet these two daughters of Mother Teresa. As we started our journey by bus I asked one of them namely Sr. Anna from Poland who works now in London to share with me her impressions about Mother Teresa. She happily shared this story from the life of Mother Teresa that she read from a book written on her.

Once her sisters were trying to prepare Chappatti (a food made into round shaped pieces, prepared by Indian mothers out of wheat and other flours). They were four sisters and the sisters wanted to prepare only three to do some penance and share. But Mother Teresa asked them to prepare five so that they will have each one and also one to share with someone in need.

It is also said about Mother that when she wrote the first rule of sisters life she was very frugal and ascetical with their food which has most often water mixed items. And at the advice of her spiritual directors she added some more nutritious items so that sisters would have strength to do the hard work they regularly take up in serving the sick and the needy.

Sr. Anna said that she was touched by Mother Teresa’s humility and simple life style. Her truthfulness was manifest always in accepting the areas in which one needs growth and listening to others. What strikes is her humanity and humility.

You are also welcome to read my other article about her on our official blog:

http://www.ofmcap.org/en/contenuti-sito/ordine-ofmcap/curia-generale/nostri-blog/segretariato-generale-della-formazione/item/827-she-was-crazy-and-different-like-brother-francis-sister-clare

 

Vibrant Person/s presence in our lives

In one of the personal growth seminars on psycho-sexual maturity Prof. Gerald McGlone said, “Even in the so called developed societies many people grow into adulthood without proper guidance, there is no one sometimes to guide the young and particularly in the areas related to personal struggles, sexuality and affectivity. Each one learns by himself most often alone because even the parents are not willing to freely discuss matters concerning sexuality and its awakening.” Life skills, in this way are learnt by some in a very partial way and may not be effective.

It brought to my awareness the need to have sensitive and understanding persons who can stand by us as we grow. Love, supportive environment, encouragement, security, presence of caring people are vital factors in our growth process. Thoughtful parents are able to fulfill that duty of accompanying their children by being a caring parents and friends to their children. But many are not able to do that due to their own life commitments to earn their livelihood which separates them from their beloved children.

Begin to search for one to confide and receive loving assurance:

Keeping aside the past however limiting it could be, one could search and find caring and guiding people who can accompany him/her as one goes through life realities. It is important to find trust worthy people who could be relied upon and confided. Their presence will become a comfort zone for us where we will find the missing link and bonding that might have been lost due to abusive childhood.Hors-1d

While accompanying people I found always that this sort of bonding emerging out of opening up to someone strengthening the person who receives support.  And it was also sometimes mutually enriching for both the persons who are into a quality relationship while sharing  and listening about life issues. These could happen during a counselling session, spiritual, other personal growth sessions or while just engaging in a casual talk with a trust worthy person.

Are you struggling alone? Do you feel that you are left out in life? Is this your feeling that you have a terrible past? Then you have a hope if you search and find a trust worthy person to just start sharing about what you feel. And if she/he is truly matured then it is going to make you blossom.

There is something in Listening caringly

Few of my friends are great listeners and with two of them I could share anything without the fear of being judged or manipulated. Some of us are able to listen for hours together and most of us may like to talk. People who facilitate sharing in others do a great service to the humanity. When someone listens carefully one feels understood.

Something beautiful unfolds

Listening is an art and it is a gift too. This art can be learned if we are ready for that. In one of my recent Holistic Integration and Healing seminars I spent many hours listening to the participants life stories. What touched me most was the blessing that empathetic listening brought to them and to me. Thoughtful listening will lead a person to understand the feeling and meaning beyond the words spoken. It effects deeper healing. Unlike in sympathy, in empathetic listening, we are not lost in the feelings expressed by the person who comes to share with us their life struggles.  But we are able to be fully present to the person and go beyond the words to help the person feel understood.

Trust builds up gradually

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Invariably on the second or the third day of a personal growth seminar people go to open up to someone they feel trustworthy. This sharing and listening brings people together and there is a new bond being established there. We need good listeners in the family, society and in the world. Let us humanise the world by our listening.